I love your selfies.
Never let anyone tell you they’re too vain, too predictable, too contrived or too self indulgent.
A selfie represents the pinnacle of you. It’s the image that makes you feel your most spectacular, that makes your eyes sparkle, that you have picked as the essence of your mood and spirit, in that moment of time.
You’ve taken a series of photos of yourself because maybe you love your outfit, you might have a new jacket that you want to show off. Maybe you’ve nailed your hair or make up. Why is your hair so bouncy and full today? You have no idea, but it’d be a crying shame to waste it. Maybe it’s been a really good day at work, or the air feels nice and the light is sweet and soft. You might have a crush, you’re in love, or have just had a great shag – that excitement, glow, and energy is radiating through you and beaming back out like stardust. It’s your birthday, it’s Christmas, or you’re at an event surrounded by fabulous people that you adore the hell out of. You want to show off, or show someone that you’re doing-just-fine-thank-you-very-much. You’re a bit drunk.
Or maybe, just for no reason at all, other than you’re simply feeling yourself. Which is the case 80% of the time. And exactly how it should be.
For whatever reason it might be, you took these photos, and from all of those, you picked this one image. The winner, that makes you feel so good about yourself that you decide this is the shot, this is the face that you’re comfortable and eager to share with your world. To put out there into the vast galaxy that is the Internet.
This selfie has been hand picked by you as the greatest version of yourself…so, why should anyone see anything less worthy or special? What gives them the goddamn right?
Why is this such a vain act? Is it hurting anyone? Are you contributing to global warming or the ever-ballooning property market?
For centuries the rich and elite have had portraits painted of them, showing them only in their best, most flattering light. Just because it’s a painting, because it’s old, hanging in the Louvre, depicts a man, or person of means, doesn’t make it any more significant or worthy than your own digital self-portrait.
Trust me, if the Victorians had smart phones, they’d be snapping selfies every moment of every day.
And let’s face it, most of this criticism is aimed at females, because most selfies are taken by females. It’s rooted in sexism. We’re shallow, were vapid, we’re stupid, we’re attention seeking teases, we’re sluts and well, we’re just asking for it.
You know what? It’s fucking hard being a woman, let alone a young girl or teenager. With the endless bombardments of weight loss, airbrushing and shitty standards that we can’t and shouldn’t live up to. All against the relentless backdrop of discrimination, wage-gaps, having to spend tens of thousands of dollars in our lifetimes on sanitary products, birth control and painkillers as well as all the other shit that we have to deal with, but I can’t be bothered listing because as important as it all is, I’m so very bored of exerting my precious breath, arguing about it, and so is every other woman.
So, give us a break. A photo of us looking nice, in a great outfit, is the least of our problems, mate.
A selfie is one little thing that I can do each day, for free, that actually boosts my self esteem and confidence. It doesn’t grind me down. It doesn’t tell me I’m not thin, cool, or good enoug. I simply post, get likes, and that makes me feel good. It’s a tiny drop in the ocean, but it helps.
Also. I’m not posting it for men. I’m not posting it thinking “oh I hope such-n-such thinks this is sexy and has a good wank to this whilst his wife is putting the kids to bed”. I’m posting it for the fellow women who I admire, respect, and follow online, who I love and click ‘like’ on. I appreciate their skillful application of an eyeshadow palette. I like their thrifted bags and brooches. I think they’re adorable, smart and hot and I want to be just like them. So as a sign of admiration and respect, I post as a sign of gratitude and payback for their own efforts.
So I say it again – I love your selfies.
In a world of shit politics, violence, needless death, corruption and atrocities against humanity – I enjoy scrolling through my feeds and seeing a photo of you, at your most confident, beaming back at me.
It’s like a little “hello, whatever else might be going in my life, that you can’t see, I’m doing alright today. I coping”. I don’t care if it’s taken from your most flattering angle, it’s filtered, or face tuned – a pretty picture is still a pretty picture. No one ever told Monet that his water lilies weren’t depicted in the most realistic light.
Please. Post away. Post with reckless abandonement, without self awareness or fear. Make my newsfeed rain glittery, wonderful, shining, selfies. Post one a week, a day or an hour. Because it’s much better than mansplaining, updates about toddler potty training, or the Trump Administration.
I say it loud and I say it proud – I love your selfies.
Never let anyone tell you otherwise.